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demonicdorothy:

devilsmadvocate:

lefayss:

dude 

like

dragons are mentioned in almost all cultures all across the world even before they had interaction with each other and you’re telling me they didn’t exist

wow it’s almost like some kind of large lizard-like creatures roamed the earth at some point and left fossilized remnants of their bodies behind that ancient cultures were trying to make sense of

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whisperedgalaxies asked:

Re: Swearing in America We don't have the most variation in our swearing, whereas a lot of other languages have swears that capture more levels of intensity that just doesn't translate. The interesting thing about "fuck" though is it is just so flexible (in american dialects). You can use it as nearly every part of speech. As a result, however, we don't use much else. As a reader from America, the use of swears in American Gods sounded very natural to me. -A linguistics major

neil-gaiman:

kaerya:

neil-gaiman:

I agree. The glory of fuck is all the things you can do with it and all the things it can do. It’s an unbefuckinglievably useful swear word (used just there as an expletive infixation). 

Except that “unbefuckinglievably” is actually is actually a really unusual form of that particular infix—to such an extent, that most English speakers would think it was wrong if they heard it said out loud.  The version usually heard is “unfuckingbelievably.”  There are a bunch of theories why this is (morpheme boundaries, prosody, stress patterns), but whatever rule it follows does seem to actually be pretty strict.

Seriously.  Say the first out loud.  It just doesn’t work.

Well, lots of people use it. Here are the Wiktionary citations for Unbefuckinglievable and its variants. 

Fuck, I love the internet sometimes. Goodnight.

Actual Quotes from my Dad (An English Teacher)

  • Dad:

    Why the hell did you put a comma there?

  • Dad:

    Do you even know what a participial phrase is?

  • Dad:

    Omg. He's like my favorite character of all time.

  • Dad:

    Who should I dress up as for the movie premier?

  • Dad:

    Hey are you awake? I know it's late, but you read Animal Farm, right? Yeah. I need you to read this report. I can't tell if I am just super tired or if this is actual bullshit.

  • Dad:

    Alesha wouldn't be able to spell 'definitely' right if wrote it down for her. She would fucking erase it and then write 'defiantly', because she doesn't care. I hate her.

  • Dad:

    I need you to bake brownies. I lost a bet.

  • Dad:

    Omg. You cannot ship me with Gilcher. You know I don't like tattoos and he's like twenty-five. And for Christ's sake, he teaches math.

  • Dad:

    Omg. Gilcher said the funniest thing today.

  • Dad:

    Mrs. Ashworth and I have decided to start a band. It'll be called Great Expectations.

  • Dad:

    It's like you didn't read the fucking book.

  • Dad:

    Okay. So this week you're reading this book I stole from Mrs. Ashworth's. It's like sixty pages long, but you'll love it.

  • Dad:

    *puts books on my bed for me to read everyday and demands that I read them*

  • Dad:

    My son doesn't like reading. I have not only failed him, but society. You aren't my son. Leave.

  • Dad:

    Okay. So you're getting books for Christmas. All of you. I get discounts on them since I'm a teacher, and since I'm a teacher, it's all I can afford, so...

  • Dad:

    Fucking standardized testing can go fuck itself in the ass.

  • Dad:

    I have to teach for the required testing instead of what they really need to know.

  • Dad:

    Fuck the government.

  • Dad:

    Fuck the school board.

  • Dad:

    Close the door.

  • Dad:

    Charles Dickens was so fucking pretentious, and I hate him, but he also caused change, but he's such a Dick. Ha. DICKens.

  • Dad:

    I love puns.

  • Dad:

    People who say sarcasm is the lowest form of humor are assholes.

  • Dad:

    Please shut up.

  • Dad:

    Catching Fire was the worst book but the best movie and that feels weird.

  • Dad:

    I wouldn't get so mad when you call me at school if you didn't change your ringtones to inappropriate rap music.

  • Dad:

    I fucking hate Alesha. She asked what countries were apart of Austria-Hungary today and I almost told her to get out.

  • Dad:

    You cannot visit my school in a dress that short. There are boys there.

  • Dad:

    Barbra Parks is fucking Queen.

  • Dad:

    I need you to make me a good, relaxing playlist for silent reading. I'm too lazy.

  • Dad:

    If I have to watch two of my students grind on each other at one more dance, I will kill them both.

  • Dad:

    They act like I care what they think.

  • Dad:

    I hate homework.

  • Dad:

    I have decided to become a politician.

  • Dad:

    What's the one book with the guys and the one kills the other and the chick without a name who dies and the short angry man? Mouseman? Oh my fucking gosh. Of Mice and Men. I have failed.

sabubu91:

rideitslut:

rural-mom:

stonecoldstunning:

men took my little pony away from us girls so us teen girls are takin pro wrestling fuck yall just try n stop us

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have fun fetishizing the shit out of *real life* celebrities. it actually makes the people who sexualize the shit out of children’s cartoons seem normal.

did you just imply being attracted to actual real human males isn’t normal but wanting to fuck cartoon horses is

I need to reblog this again because it still makes me laugh

(Source: skankplissken)

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